CJ boosted

Had a great memory about my crush in high school: she saw my Trump 2016 sticker on the back of my chair and said “nice bumper sticker, faggot.” It’s one of the hottest memories of my life. I refuse to look her up again because she’s probably fat now.

My county just decriminalized prostitution, I finally don’t have to hide my sexuality anymore. It feels great to be a free man.

CJ you’re being a cringe Zionist right now.” Sorry what did you say? I’m too busy being cringe on top of my giant piles of cash.

Why would anybody defend Palestine Name me one prominent Palestinian lawyer, movie producer or tax evading accountant. You can’t.

“If I had a time machine I’d kill Hitler AND stop 9/11.” I just want a chance to fall in love with her.

CJ boosted

@CrippledJesus If you've been playing poker for half an hour and still don't know who the human is, you're the human.

Who am I in The Ratpack?

My dad just roasted me: “What did you have for dinner, adderall and cock?” Now I know where my sense of humor comes from.

Nobody will ever be as cool as Dean Martin. I love Vegas!

Somethings wrong with my head: I’m middle class and yet the idea of poor people still saddens me.

God, I think I hate teachers even more than the police.

CJ boosted

The only way you can truly own the libs is to be funny.

A streaming network dedicated to everything Norm McDonald. I’m calling it Cultural Norm.

Let’s call homeless people Raggamuffins again.

@IncelEmperor getting laid inspired me to create this wonderful art congratulations buddy! P.S. thanks for making me some money!

CJ boosted
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